Domestic Violence
What is Domestic
Violence?
Domestic Violence or Abuse is a pattern of behavior used by one person in order to establish and maintain power and control in a relationship. Abusers repeatedly subject their victims to forceful physical and/or psychological behavior in order to coerce the victim's rights, feelings or well being.
● More than 1 in 3 women say they are abused by a intimate partner at some point in their lives.
● Domestic Violence is the leading cause of serious injury to women - More common than muggings, rapes and car crashed combined.
● In West Virginia, a domestic homicide occurs every 14 days.
● 40% of girls ages 14 to 17 reports knowing someone their age who has been hit or beaten by a boyfriend.
● Approximately 1 in 5 female high school students report being physically and/or sexually abused by a dating partner.
● The leading cause of death in pregnant women is homicide, often related to domestic violence.
How do I know when
someone I love crosses the line?
No matter what type of relationship you are in, (husband and wife, boyfriend and girlfriend, parent and child, caretaker and care receiver, alternative) if the other person is hurting you emotionally and/or physically, they are crossing the line.
Crossing the line generally does not happen suddenly - It is more like a series of events leading to a place that you never thought you would be. If anything listed below is happening in your life, the line of safety is being crossed.
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Putting you down/Calls you names; playing mind games; making you feel guilty. |
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Humiliates You. Calls you names, insults
you or makes fun of your disabilities. "You are so stupid and ugly; no
one else would have you." "You are crazy." |
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Controlling what you do, who you see and talk to, what you read, where you go; limiting you outside involvement; using
jealousy to justify actions. |
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Keeps you away from family and friends. Acting in a
way that makes friends and family stop coming around; going through your
belongings. "Tracks" you all the time. |
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Using the children/grandchildren to control you. |
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Saying that you are not a fit parent; threatening to
take the children/grandchildren. |
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Using looks and/or actions to scare you. |
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Raising a fist to make a point; giving a look that
means "You'd better do and say what I want or else," when in public
to remind you that physical harm will come to you if you do not obey. |
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Controlling the family income; keeping you from working; making you ask for money;
taking money from you. |
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Keeping you up all night before a job interview;
refusing transportation to work or school; not allowing others to provide
information that will help you become more independent. |
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Making and/or carrying out threats. |
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Threatening to kill you; taking away medication or medical
equipment; exposing you to hate crimes, racism, or immigration problems. |
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Making light of the abuse; saying the abuse didn't happen; blaming the abuse
on you. |
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"I didn't mean to hit you that hard."
"I didn't push you, you fell". "Everyone fights, its part of
loving someone" "If you weren't so difficult, I wouldn't get so
angry." |
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Destroying property; abusing pets; displaying weapons |
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Slamming a fist on a table or through a wall; throwing
objects; cleaning a gun in front of you to make a point; Destroys things that
are important to you. |
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Slaps,
hits, pushes, holds you down, chokes, pulls your
hair. |
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Causing bruises, broken bones, permanent physical
injury or death. Threatens to hurt you or does something to hurts you. |
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BREAK THE CYCLE OF DOMESTIC VIOLENCE |
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STAGE
ONE Tension Building Abuser has short temper. Blames victim for everything going wrong. |
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STAGE
TWO Battering Stage Abuser is verbally abusive. Escalates to physical abuse. |
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STAGE
THREE Honeymoon Stage Abuser offers gifts - is loving |
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What Can Your DO To Help Stop The Abuse? |
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If you are afraid or in danger, CALL THE POLICE OR SHERIFF
They can transport you to a safe location and provide information about your rights to protection under the law.
TALK TO SOMEONE
Part of the abuser's power comes from secrecy.
If someone is hurting you, it is not your fault and you are not alone. Talk with someone you trust - a good friend, a caring health care or social worker, a sensitive family member, or an understanding person from your faith community. Talk to some one who will:
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● Listen to you. ● Believe you. ● Not blame you. ● Not discriminate against you. ● Keep what you tell them confidential. ● Allow you to make you own decisions. |
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DEVELOP A SAFETY PLAN
Plan ahead to know what you and your children will do if violence should occur. If you are ready to leave, have a plan for a safe place to go. Think about setting aside some money and getting together important papers - Social Security cards, birth certificatess, identification, legal documents, etc. Pack a bag with these items, any needed medication, and important contact numbers in a safe place in case you should need to leave quickly.
SEEK HELP
Talk to a domestic violence counselor about becoming free of the abuse.
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THE
LIGHTHOUSE (Weirton, WV) 304.797.SAFE (304.797.7233) Domestic Violence Safe House Open 24hrs a day 7 days a week to help YOU! ADVOCACY Information and Referral Service Plan Development Housing Resources Educational Needs Financial Needs / Resources Child Care Resources Children's Programming Parenting Information and Training Job Training Medical Needs/ Resources Supportive Counseling Community Education Housing The Lighthouse is available
to residents of Brooke and Hancock Counties. |
YWCA Family Violence Prevention Program (Wheeling, WV) 1
800 698 1247 SOMEONE
TO LISTEN SUPPORT
GROUPS SAFE
SHELTER COURT
ADVOCACY EDUCATIONAL
PROGRAMS REFERRALS |
Brooke County Sheriff's Department
Sheriff Richard D Ferguson
Created by: T Jarrell